Well hello there gorgeous people. Welcome back to my blog and if this is your first time here, then welcome to the TRUKOS family!
Lets' talk about mental health. Often we see on social media a lot of how to stay fit or how to have a healthy diet videos (I'm not going to lie, sometimes I spend hours watching those even though I know I will never try them 'cause that's just how lazy I am). Unconsciously, by watching this type of videos, we become so obsessed with our physical appearance that we forget there's something more important we have to take care of and that's our mental health.
People get this yucky feeling when they hear those words and that's because there's a social stigma attached to mental health. No, talking about it does not make you a depressive person and it's not also a girl thing... It's actually something that affects us all and the less we talk about it, the sicker we become .
Today I want to shatter all the labels and share with you guys ten things that I remind myself to have a good mental health. So without further ado, let's get started.
1. Learn that everything happens for a reason
When we go through hard times, the first thing we ask ourselves is "why me?". Two words that have the power to haunt you forever if you let them. We hold up to that question and we don't allow ourselves to just accept the moment as it is. And when we don't accept something, we don't stop resisting and when we don't stop resisting, we can't find the lesson of our problems. Through the years, I have learned that time gives you the answers to your questions at the perfect timing. Never seek them out, just wait patiently and they will come to you. In the meantime, smile through the pain and tell yourself that as long clouds exist, everything is going to be alright. Eventually things will fall into place.
Don't get me wrong, of course everyone wants to know why bad things happen to us but look at it this way... If someone leaves you, let them go. Maybe they weren't meant to be in your life anymore. If someone betrays you, now you learn who deserves your trust and who don't. If you lose someone you love, now you learn how to appreciate people before they slip away. My point is, everything happens for a reason and that reason is to make you learn something you didn't know or maybe you didn't realize before. It's up to you if you want to accept that lesson and grow wiser or not.
2. Have a good cry
Our emotions are like a can of soda in constant shaking. The more we hold them up, the sooner we're going to explode. For some reason, we are afraid to cry and to feel our emotions. Society is the reason. It has taught us that crying is for weak and numb people. Let me tell you something... SOCIETY IS WRONG! Sometimes you need to have a good cry so you can let out everything that has been consuming you inside. Crying washes out a part of your pain and it lets you see life with a clearer view. Also, it has been scientifically proven that when we cry, we stimulate endorphins which are "feel-good" hormones.
If you need to stay a whole day at home crying, DO IT! Allow yourself to feel the pain that is meant to be felt. Just let it go, don't hold it up and don't let it eat you alive. I promise you, the next day you will be feeling a little bit better and fresh as a daisy.
3. Write down your feelings
Some are lucky enough to have someone by their side to listen to them and others... well the only person they have to give them support is their own selves. There are times when we do have a shoulder to cry on but we feel like we are going to be judge so we hold up everything for ourselves. That is toxic. Ask yourself this... If you keep pushing your thoughts and emotions under your bed, what's going to happen when there's no space left?
The main key to have a good mental health is to let go of what does no good for you. If you don't have or if you don't want to talk to someone about what's bothering you, then write it down. I know it may sound stupid and you might think that having a journal is for kids but it's actually not. It really is one of the most effective tools to get to know yourself. When you sit down and hear your inner voice while you write down everything that's on your mind, you decrease the risk of overthinking and taking bad decisions.
4. Have some "me time"
I'm that type of person who needs a loooooot of "me time". It's how I recharge my batteries, take some fresh air and block everybody's voice to hear my own. Most of the time we give our attention to others and we forget that us ourselves deserve our own attention more than anybody else. Turn off your phone at least once a month and take the time to do the things you love the most.
Surround yourself with nature, draw, listen to music, sing, dance like nobody's watching, decor your room, read inspiring quotes, watch random YouTube videos all day, workout, cook, etc. (Okay, I just realized I mentioned the majority of the things I do when I'm alone)
"Me time" has taught me that my happiness does not rely on someone's company because I can be happy by my own. That's how you know you are in a good point in your life, when being alone does not make you feel lonely. This has been my favorite therapy so I highly recommend it.
5. Never get attached!
Attachment means expectations and expectations lead to disappointments.
We all have heard this before, right? Yet, is not until our stubborn selves get disappointed by people that those words sting us like a bee. Learn to be an independent soul and let others be independent too!
We all dream of having a lifetime best friend and an endless relationship but life doesn't work like that. People come and go... Some come into our lives as a blessing and others as a lesson. Let me take one of my favorite quotes from Osho as an example: "Love isn't about possession, is about admiration". When people run out of our lives the first thing we think is "Oh, he/she was such a waste of my time" but that's not true.
When you develop the capacity of admiring others without attaching them to you, you learn that every single person that you have walked a path with is a gift to you, regardless of the ending they had in your story.
6. Know your darn value!
If someone hasn't tell you this well just know that I think you are so freaking amazing, valuable and worth it. One of the worst mistakes you could ever make is believing what others think and seeing yourself through the eyes of those who don't value you. Do not underestimate your worth for someone's attention. DON'T! You improve your happiness by putting yourself first and this doesn't make selfish, it makes you smart and conscious of your worth because if you think someone will put you first than themselves, honey let me tell you you're wrong.
Making your happiness, self-love and self-awareness a priority is necessary!
7. Accept yourself
YOU DO NOT NEED ANYBODY'S APPROVAL IN ORDER TO BE GOOD ENOUGH! You already are, you just have to believe it. With a society centered in the fallacy of perfection, you will never ever ever find validation from everyone. Don't be insecure and embrace your unique self. I know this is a difficult task for most of us but is not impossible. It just takes time. Find a role model that inspires you to be a better version of yourself and if you can't find one (I doubt it) then be one. Mine are Ellen DeGeneres and Ashley Graham.
8. Do not compare yourself to others
Why do we desire so much other people's lives and don't appreciate the things we are lucky enough to have? This has been a struggle for me for the last two years because I tend to compare my success with others'. Sometimes I feel like I haven't even accomplished half of my dreams and that I'm not in the place where I want to be... but reality is, I'm actually in the place where I have to be.
When I feel like a loser I just sit down and think about all the amazing opportunities that have knocked my door. If someone would have told me years ago that I was going to be able to meet artists, get access as press to concerts and events and have a lot of people supporting me on my projects, I would have definitely rolled my eyes and walked away. That's the thing, we doubt ourselves. We think we are not capable of doing things and that big dreams are just dreams.
Do I have the most successful blog? No. Am I the most experienced editor and videographer? No. Have I worked on a TV program? No. BUT I'M TRYING AND WORKING HARD ON IT! It doesn't matter how much others have succeeded; what really matters is how hard you work to improve yourself and to accomplish your goals.
9. Don't compete
I'm a truly believer that we rise by lifting others. Be kind, inspire, show others their potential and how awesome they are. Believe me, this will fill your soul with so much joy because you're not only enjoying your happiness, you are also helping and celebrating the happiness of those who surround you.
10. Lastly but definitely not least, never hold a grudge
"Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die." -Buddah
When you hold a grudge you are just expecting that the people who hurt you will feel and understand your pain. You hope that someday they will apologize for everything they have done...and when that doesn't happen we feel so horrible with ourselves.
If you want to let go of a grudge you need to let go of your ego. Don't wait for someone who hurt you to say "I'm sorry" because you don't need it. It's our ego who wants that apology so you can feel superior and less vulnerable than others. The biggest lesson I've learned in my life is that the only person I need to hear "I'm sorry" from is myself. When you don't forgive yourself you feel discussed with everything that you do. You hit rock bottom and you just stop living.
John Green once said, "You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world...but you do have some say in who hurts you."
You have choices! You either take the pain, learn from the situation, change your perspective towards life and move on or you just stay in a world full of darkness and misery. Again, it's up to you. LIFE IS WORTH LIVING! Do not waste any second of it suffering for people who don't give damn about you.
STOP HATING! START LIVING!
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Well that's it for today. I have to admit, this is my favorite blog post so far. I'm a sucker for deep conversations so I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did writing it.
If you guys want me to publish more of this type of blog posts, please let me know.
Thank you so so so so much for all your support. I'm still shocked and overwhelmed with happiness. I never thought so many of you would have voted on my Instagram story. It means the universe to me!
If you want to share a tip for taking care of our mental health, I will be thrilled to listen to you. Just DM me!
PLEASE share this post! There are so many people out there who might need this so let's help them.
Okay, I will stop talking now... LOVE YOU ALL!
Bye, bye.
- Karina
PS. Here's a gallery with ten of my favorite quotes from this post so you guys can download them!
